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A Dog’s Diary vs. a Cat’s Diary

Thursday, May 27th, 2010

Chester is a happy dog!

Excerpts taken from a Dog’s Diary:

7:00 am
Dry Kibble! My favorite thing!

9:30 am
A walked to the park! My favorite thing!

9:40 am
Did a scoot in the grass! My favorite thing!

10:00 am
Fetched a ball! My favorite thing!

11:30 am
Got a belly rub! My favorite thing!

12:00 pm
Dry Cookie! My favorite thing!

1:00 pm
Chased a squirrel in the yard! My favorite thing!

2:00 pm
Barked at the mailman! My favorite thing!

3:00 pm
Scratched my butt! My favorite thing!

5:00 pm
More Dry Kibble! My favorite thing!

7:00 pm
Got to play tug o war! My favorite thing!

8:00 pm
Watched TV on the couch! My favorite thing!

11:00 pm
Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!

Excerpts taken from a Cat’s Diary:

Tabby CatDay 863 of my captivity.

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre furry dangling objects.

They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed some sort of dry bland nuggets.

Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I force myself to choke down the detestable provisions. I must keep up my strength, or I shall perish.

The only thing that keeps me hope is my dream of escape. In an attempt to vex them, I have once again vomited on the sofa. I made a point to aim my bile at the leaders favorite spot.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless twitching body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a ‘good little hunter’ I am. Bastards.

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight, and I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food that should have been mine. I overheard that my confinement was due to a mysterious thing called ‘allergies.’ I must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost succeeded in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around her feet as she was walking. I will try this again tomorrow… but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and perhaps even snitches. The canine receives special privileges. He is regularly released, and for some reason unbeknownst to me, seems more than willing to return! He is obviously a moronic half-witt.

The blasted bird has got to be an informant. I have observed him communicating with the guards regularly, I am certain he reports my every move. My captors have placed him into protective custody. He rests in an elevated cell, so he is safe… For now.

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20 Fun & Funky Dog Names!

Tuesday, February 9th, 2010

Are you tired of the same, old, boring doggie names? We put on our creative doggie caps and have dog piled 20 funky and fun dog names for your new pooch. Don’t forget to say your favorite dog name in a sentence before you make your final decision, don’t worry we gave you some examples. Happy name hunting!

Brandy gets a kick out of the boy namesFOR THE BOYS

Chance - “Nice Chance!”

Dash - “Dash! Away you bad dog!”

Diesel - “Put Diesel in the car.”

Fitch - “Fitch, you in?”

Luke - “See the duck? Luke, over there!”

Mister - “Listen Mister, you better come inside right now!”

Money - “You found your favorite toy? Show me Money!”

Nite - “Get in your bed. Good Nite!”

Storm - “Wipe his paws, Storm’s coming in.”

Trooper - “Your such a good Trooper!”


FOR THE GIRLS

Bea - “Don’t Bea! Bad dog!”

Cher - “Stop being so greedy with your kibble Cher.”

Cloud - “You’re so fluffy Cloud!”

Faith - “Don’t worry I have Faith.”

Honey - “Where could my Honey be?”

Moxie - “I’ve got Moxie!”

Munky - “Where’s my little Munky?”

Stars - “There she is, I see Stars!”Nessa gives the girl names five woofs!

Suki - “Is Suki in the house or in the car?”

Tipsy - “Oh you’re a little Tipsy, aren’t you?”

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Holiday Dogs!

Thursday, December 24th, 2009

Over the years we have taken pleasure in delighting people with our fun Holiday Cards featuring our family dogs. The first few years star Weimaraners Molly, Klaus and Gina. Later Yorkshire Terrier Tiffany and Biewer Yorkshire Terrier a la Pom-Pon Kimber joined our family. Here are the cards from the past five years. Enjoy!

Mountain Sheep Herder and his Flock

Mountain Sheep Herder

Santa Klaus and his Elves

Santa Klaus and his Elves

Christmas Morning

Christmas Morning

Holiday Cookies

Holiday Cookies

Gift Wrapping

Gift Wrapping

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Budget Friendly Howl-o-ween Costumes

Thursday, October 22nd, 2009

Any dog would agree that it’s just not right to let your best friend trick or treat in the nude, so make sure you wear a costume and put your dog in one too! We’ve come up with some simple doggie costume ideas that won’t bark the bank, and require no sewing, or gluing. Each of our costume ideas cost less than $5 and can even be made with items you may already have at home. Just look around your house to see what you can use to make your dog extra special this Howl-o-ween.

Mummy Dog

The Mummy Dog

Everyone needs a Mummy, especially an adorable furry one. Here’s what you’ll need to complete your Mummy Dog:
Gauze & Tea Bag
1. Multiple Rolls of Guaze
2. Black Tea Bag

You will need enough gauze to loosely cover your dog. Make a cup of strong black tea and soak half of your gauze rolls in the tea, hang to dry.

Start with the remaining white gauze, loosely wrapping the gauze around your dogs torso. Tie the ends of the gauze together and continue wrapping your dog, pull at the gauze to give it a tattered grunge look as you wrap. Finish wrapping with the tea stained gauze allowing sections of the white gauze to show through. Loosely drape an end of the gauze over your dogs forehead and tie to collar.

Do not apply gauze tightly to your dog or around limbs. Avoid wrapping gauze around your dog’s neck, instead use your dog’s collar to support the gauze up to the forehead. Voila, you have an official Mummy for Howl-o-ween!
Baby Dog

Baby Barker

Make your dog an official baby by adding old baby items to create a fun Baby Barker! Here’s what you’ll need to complete your Baby Barker:

1. Bib
2. Pacifier
3. Single Hair Bow
4. Doggie Diapers if you have them

This one is easy, simply attach bib to your dogs neck, if your dog’s neck is too large pin the bib to the collar, if your dog’s neck is too small, cut or pin the bib to fit.

Nuk & BibIf your dog already wears doggie diapers use them to make this baby look complete, don’t use real baby diapers on your dog because that’s just wrong. Pin a Pacifier to the bib, or use a ribbon to tie it to the collar, this is just a prop so monitor your dog so the pacifier doesn’t become a chew toy. Use a cute little hair clip to finish off the look and your Baby Barker is ready to be babied!

Spa Lady

Spa Lady

Every dog has it’s day at the spa! Make this Howl-o-ween full of clean family fun with a Spa Lady costume. Here’s what you’ll need to complete your Spa Lady:

1. Bath Pouf
2. Rubber Ducky
3. Foam Hair Roller
4. Old hand or sweat towel

Wrap your dog’s torso with the hand towel and roll down the top edge over the corner, pin if needed. Tie the bath pouf to the collar, do not hang over your dog’s neck. If your dog has long hair roll the foam roller on the crown of the head.
Bath Items
You could also attach a colorful shower or swim cap to your dog using elastic or ribbon to create a party hat style strap, then cut out ear holes for your dog. Supervise your dog so the cap doesn’t slip and cover your dog’s nose or become a choking hazard. Now your dog is ready to be pampered!

Safe Props

With any costume always monitor your dog and never leave your dog unattended. All props and clothing should be simple to remove and safe if your dog does manage to chew on it before you can take it away. For props use items your dog already enjoys such as squeaky toys and treats to make creative fun costumes. Try attaching a fun squeaky toy animal to your dog’s harness to transform your dog into a miniature horse. Old clothing such as football jerseys or tennis shorts can also make funny costumes that will make your dog howl. Have a happy and safe Howl-o-ween!

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Super Zoo’s Creative Poodles!

Thursday, September 17th, 2009

Super Zoo, The National Show for Pet Retailers, was abuzz with all kinds of new products, groomers, and naturally dogs! Here are photos of our favorite Poodles showing off their most creative Halloween looks.

Gilligan has a love-hate relationship with Candy Corn.

Gilligan shaved as Candy Corn!

Felix isn’t afraid of the scorpion on his back!

Scorpion Poodle

Cindy is ready for a game of Pac-Man, can you find the joy stick?

Cindy shaved as Pac-Man

Oh no – the ghosts are after Pac-Man!

Cindy's ghosts!

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Why did the Dachshund finish the race?

Sunday, June 14th, 2009

Wiener Dogs Comic

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Doggone Dumb Laws!

Saturday, May 23rd, 2009

Check out these dumb U.S. laws!

ALASKA

Anchorage: No one may tie their pet dog to the roof of a car.

CALIFORNIA

• Animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship.Master on Leash

Belvedere: City Council order reads: “No dog shall be in a public place without its master on a leash”.

Cathedral City: One may not bring their dog to school.

Cerritos: All dog “waste” must be removed from any yard within seven days.

Glendale: One may not take his dog on an elevator with him.

Los Angeles: It is a crime for dogs to mate within 500 yards of a church.

Portola: One may not allow his or her dog to chase a squirrel in the summer.

San Jose: It is illegal to have more than two cats or dogs.

Shasta Lake: One may not raffle off a dog as a gift in any public place.

COLORADO

Alamosa: To own a dog over three months of age, one must obtain a license.Dog License

Denver: The dog catcher must notify dogs of impounding by posting, for three consecutive days, a notice on a tree in the city park and along a public road running through said park.

CONNECTICUT

Hartford: You may not educate dogs.

ILLINOIS

Chicago: It is illegal to give a dog whiskey.

Crete: It is considered an offense to attempt to have sex with one’s dog.

Galesburg: No person may keep a smelly dog.

Normal: It is against the law to make faces at dogs.

Zion: It is illegal for anyone to give lighted cigars to dogs, cats, or any other domesticated animals.

KANSAS

Topeka: No matter how nice it may be, a pet Pit Bull is not allowed within the city limits.

KENTUCKY

Fort Thomas: Dogs may not molest cars.

MASSACHUSETTS

Boston: It is illegal for any citizen to own more than three dogs.

Hopkinton: Though horses and cows are allowed on the common, dogs are prohibited.

Malboro: It is illegal for any citizen to own more than two dogs.

MICHIGAN

• DOG LAW OF 1919: It is illegal to kill a dog using a decompression chamber.

MONTANA

• One may not pretend to abuse an animal in the presence of a minor.

NORTH CAROLINA

Barber: Fights between cats and dogs are prohibited.

Rocky Mount: It is required that you must pay a property tax on your dog.

OHIOHow To Quiet  a Dog

Paulding: A policeman may bite a dog to quiet him.

OKLAHOMA

• Dogs must have a permit signed by the mayor in order to congregate in groups of three or more on private property.

• People who make “ugly faces” at dogs may be fined and/or jailed.

Bartlesville: If ones dog is run over by a car, the owner must pay for the dog’s disposal.

OREGON

Stanfield: It is against the law for animals to have sex in the city limits.

PENNSYLVANIA

Millville: One may not shoot any dog that is found wandering the streets.

SOUTH CAROLINANo Dogs on Beach

Clemson: “Vicious Dogs” may not be kept within the city limits. Bitches in heat shall be confined.

Myrtle Beach: Dogs may not be on the beach during the summer months during the daytime or the owner may be arrested.

TENNESSEE

• The definition of “dumb animal” includes every living creature.

TEXAS

Jasper: Dogs must be on a leash at ALL times.

UTAH

Ogden: No molesting animals.

VIRGINIA

• No animal may be hunted for on Sunday with the exception of raccoons, which may be hunted until 2:00 AM.

WEST VIRGINIA

• It is legal for a male to have sex with an animal as long as it does not exceed 40 lbs.

• Roadkill may be taken home for supper.

Check out these dumb International laws!

NORWAY

• You may not spay your female dog or cat.

ISRAEL

• It is against the law to feed animals in public places.

• It is considered an offense to operate a mobile spay/neuter clinic – it is considered peddling.

• The raising of Rotweiller dogs is prohibited.

Content from ‘Doggone Dumb Laws’ was obtained on DumbLaws.com

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